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Man Sells Holy Hardware on eBay

by Jimmy the Priate

MANCHESTER, CT - Thomas Haley was unloading supplies for his job at Hardy's Hardware when he said something odd caught his eye: the face of Jesus Christ on a piece of sheet metal. Now, Haley and a co-worker are hawking the holy hardware on eBay, hoping potential bidders will agree that the blurry oil stain on the sheet metal does, indeed, resemble Jesus.

"I mean, it hasn't done anything miraculous as of yet, but seeing it is kind of groovy," said Haley, 23. "Just seeing it brightens people's day."

Haley said that whatever money is raised will be split between him, Jackson, another worker, and two customers. But he's still a little ambivalent about the sale.

“I feel kind of bad just pawning off Christ,” Haley said.

He continued, “But Christ was a giver – a water into wine, loaves of fish, dying for our sins kinda guy, so I’m sure he wouldn’t mind me making a few bucks off him. Christ would want me to sell this.”