ope...a life ope.2
Pacific sunset.
Nunchuck bus stop parte seconda
ooooooo. alternate punchline. "The call was coming from inside the caterpillar!"
My rep did the same thing. Every time you hear that the two parties are the same? This is one of the reasons why. This right here:
received a reply from my House rep — I’d written in saying I questioned her commitment to our laws for voting to table impeachment, she said yeah what the president did was unconstitutional but we were never gonna win and it would have looked partisan… so basically, confirming her lack of commitment to law in favor of "politics"
these are a few of my favorite things.
Slowly gathering all my old site stuff I can find and putting it in the archivio.antico. A trip down memory lane.
A little preview from a couple decades ago:
Man. So uncool. I tried rewatching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine the last couple nights.
I couldn't do it.
Didn't enjoy it.
I mean, it was neat to see the characters again. Actors did a great job acting. Characters were nifty. Sisko? Great! Garak? Fabulous! Dukat? Love to hate to love him! Kira? Spicy! Dax? Fun!
But, I just didn't care? I can't decide if it's because the plots seemed so contrived (and I know it's always been that way) or if it's because it's such an accurate reflection of what's happening today (we're living it, yo), but I just couldn't.
Watched the first six episodes. Skipped around a bit in seasons two and three. Watched the first couple episodes when Sisko shaved his head. Dominion war! Founders! Maquis! Klingons!
Nothing.
It's a sad, sad day, my friends. A sad day, indeed.
No jury duty for me.
Disqualification Request Result - Lincoln County Circuit Court Your disqualification was granted. You're no longer required to report for jury. For questions, please contact the court.
Spiders suck.
Totally suck.
Absolutely completely utterly suck.
And I know. I know. We're supposed to be cool with spiders nowadays. Spider Bros, they say. They eat all the pests in your house, they say. They're more scared of you then you are of them, the say.
You know what I say?
Get bent spiders!
I don't know if it's a PNW thing or what, but these big, evil looking spiders that make their way into our house are...not...cool, man!
This one time, I woke up. Good start to the day, right? Waking up? So I wake up, get out of bed, shuffle my way to the railing overlooking the stairs to the first floor of our house, and, as I put my hands on the railing, still half asleep and eyes mostly shut, my hand brushes something off the railing.
Huh, I think to myself, but, you know, barely, because conscious thought isn't really part of my reality that early in the morning, wouldn't it be funny if that were a spider? And that was it. As soon as I thought the thought I forgot the thought. It dropped out of my consciousness. I yell, "Love you!" to my wife and "Sweet Pea!" to my cat, and, with my day started properly I shuffle off to the bathroom to do bathroom-type things.
As I sat down on the toilet, I noticed a black blur out of the corner of my eye. I turned my head to see a big black spider crawl under the door and into the bathroom. It stopped, turned toward me, and ran.
"Bro!" I said.
It stopped and said, "Sup!"
I said, "You did not just crawl under the bathroom door to come at me!"
It replied, "You did not just knock me off that railing!"
"Bruh," I insisted. "I was asleep! I didn't know you were there!"
"Well that makes it all okay then doesn't it," it sassed, slowly crawling toward me.
"Bruh!" I reiterated.
"Bruv!" It replied, stopping again. "You done fucked around now you're gonna find out!" It ran toward me again.
"Not cool!" I replied. "I got my drawers down over here trying to take a dump!"
"Like a bitchass chump," it said, still coming at me.
"Stop!" I yelled, standing up. "Don't start nuthin, won't be nuthin!"
"Big talk," it said, then stopped right in front of me. It focused all eight of its eyes on my private parts and continued, "for a little man."
"You little fucker!" I said as he closed the last of the gap between us.
"Is that what your wife calls it?"
I grabbed the box of tissues from the top of the toilet tank behind me and brought it down right on top of it. I lifted the box and saw the spider's legs begin to curl up. It's eyes focused on me briefly, so I said, "Bitch, please," then saw eight points of light fade into darkness.
Then there was this other time. I was sitting on the toilet again. I don't want to paint too much of a picture here, but I had just finished my business and went to grab toilet paper to, you know, complete the transaction, so I roll the toilet paper and out shoots another big evil spider! Out Of the toilet roll! It drops a little piece of silk on the edge of the roll and it rappels down to the ground then scutters under the nearest floorboard trim.
It was waiting for me in the toilet paper roll.
Little fucker.
It was waiting for me in the toilet paper roll!
Goddamn arachnids!
It was waiting...
...for me...
...in the toilet paper roll.
That's how it wants to come at me? When my pants are down around my ankles?
So yeah, you can talk all you want about ecological balance and spider bros and how beneficial they are and how much better off we are that they're around.
You're wrong.
Spiders suck.
Totally suck.
Absolutely completely utterly suck.